Most people want to move out of the marital home during a divorce (or want their spouse to move out). While this is understandable, the timing of the move is important to the divorce process.
In some cases, moving out prematurely can affect the division of property or assets at the conclusion of the divorce. In others, moving out is part of the process that signals the intention to follow through with the request for divorce. In all cases, seeking the advice of a reputable divorce attorney will help you determine the correct steps and timing for your individual situation.
1. Legal and Financial Considerations When Moving Out
Leaving the marital home should only be done after careful thinking and planning. Choosing to leave can cause your spouse to have a greater claim to the home, especially if their name is not on the mortgage or deed. Once occupancy has been given up, it can be difficult to later reclaim it if you decide that you want to live in your home again. Just because the home is considered communal property does not mean that it will be sold or evenly split between the spouses.
Leaving your home can also be extremely expensive, especially in cities and states with a high cost of living. Taking on all of the expenses of running a household solo can be difficult, and it can affect any child or spousal support calculations. Individuals who leave the marital home to a non-working spouse can be ordered to pay temporary spousal support, increasing the cost of moving out and shifting the burden of two households onto a single person. If both spouses work, it is important to sit down with attorneys and come up with a clear agreement as to which spouse will pay which expense during the divorce.
2. Custody and Parenting Considerations
Children complicate any divorce or separation, and courts are very invested in the welfare of children during the proceedings. Taking children from the family home without approval from the other spouse can be considered parental kidnapping, especially if the parent then refuses to let the children see their other parent. There are also requirements that neither parent discourage the relationship between the children and their spouse. If the parent with the children has any sort of financial stability issues, history of addiction, or otherwise proves during the separation that they are not well-suited to primary custody of their children, they can be disadvantaged during custody negotiations and may lose custody altogether in favor of visitation.
It is important for both parties to come to an agreement on a parenting plan, especially considering financial responsibility and time spent with the children, so that the children can have their lives disrupted as little as possible.
3. Emotional and Psychological Impacts
Separations are very emotionally charged times, and continuing to live with someone with whom you no longer feel able to maintain a relationship can be daunting. Moving out, especially during particularly contentious divorces, can provide significant emotional relief. However, marriages do typically provide a great deal of emotional support and companionship and choosing to leave them can cause a great deal of emotional distress and loneliness.
It is vital to have an external support network nearby and to prepare yourself for the emotional challenges that are involved in a divorce, especially when you move out and are alone for what may be the first time in years. There are support groups available in most major cities.
4. Temporary Orders and Legal Agreements
Involving the Court and obtaining an official order that establishes a binding temporary agreement on residence and expenses is vital. It prevents misunderstandings by clearly defining which party is entitled to live in the shared home, which party has to pay for any mortgage or rent, whether one spouse is entitled to a vehicle that the other spouse considers to be their property, and other important questions.
A complete financial disclosure is necessary for this process; attorneys and the Court use it to determine fairness when temporarily dividing assets and assigning responsibility for bills and debts. Your attorney can also help you fill out the disclosure forms to ensure that nothing is missed or mistakenly included, and will advocate for your interests if you or your spouse has left the shared home.
5. Situations When Moving Out May Be Necessary
If you or your children are being abused or fear for your safety, moving out is an important step. Your priority should be your safety and the safety of any children. Your attorney can help you file for a temporary restraining order and find safe shelter options, including shelters and temporary housing. If you need to leave suddenly, you should remember to take identifying documents such as passports, birth certificates, drivers’ licenses, and Social Security cards, as well as items of personal or emotional value that you fear may be damaged or destroyed. You should also document your reasons for leaving, including taking photographs or any injuries or damage.
If the divorce is highly contentious, it can be in your best interests to leave before the situation escalates further. Having distance can help calm tempers and make negotiations easier, especially when attorneys are brought in as intermediaries. You and your attorney should discuss the benefits of staying versus the benefits of leaving before you make a decision.
Experienced Help for Complex Divorce Questions Like Moving Out
Before you move out during a divorce, you first need to consider the financial, emotional, and legal results of that choice, especially if there are children involved. Every divorce and separation is different, and there is no one-size-fits-all plan or agreement. If you are considering a divorce, please don’t hesitate to contact Joseph R. Zoucha, Attorney & Counselor At Law, for advice on how to best proceed while protecting your interests.